An interview with Sheriff Will Diaz – Part 19 – Sowing Anger

A continuation of the interview with Sheriff Will Diaz. Will Diaz is the central character in the four novels that make up The Lawman Series. The fifth book is expected out about Christmas of 2025.

Sheriff Will Diaz – You know, you’re right. I am still upset over that case.

Richard Muniz – What do you think would have happened if you hadn’t let you temper get in the way?

Sheriff Diaz – (Shrugs) I don’t know. I’m pretty certain you and I wouldn’t be having this conversation. But then you don’t know. Maybe we’d be talking about this in a different way.

One thing I am certain of. I wouldn’t be as happy as I am now.

Muniz – So, you’re saying it was fated we meet, talk, and I write your story.

Sheriff Diaz – No. No, it wasn’t. We arrived at this table in this coffee shop through a series of choices.

Muniz – So, it didn’t just happen.

Sheriff Diaz – You’re talking pre-destination.

Muniz – Do you believe in it?

Sheriff Diaz – Well, do I think this was all meant to happen? Let’s look at it this way. There’s two kinds of writers. There’s the plotter who figures out the plot and conversations before they even sit down and write it out.

Then there’s the pantster. That writer has an idea where A is and where Z is, but what happens and what’s said in between is anyone’s guess. And more often than not, what happens in between, has an impact on what happens at the end.

I think a pantster approach is the best. That’s where the characters live the story out. They come alive and they come out the other side transformed.

Muniz – That’s not what I’m asking.

Sheriff Diaz – What are you asking.

Muniz – Do you believe everything that happened to you was pre-destined? Ordained in fact by God.

Sheriff Diaz – No way. I don’t even think only certain people were already decided to be saved. The only thing about me that is written in stone is I was born and I will die. There will challenges along the way like sickness and death, things completely beyond my control. Everything else is my choices.

Muniz – It sound like you do believe in it?

Sheriff Diaz – Not at all. Indeed, it that were the case, we wouldn’t even to ask that question because the answer would already be provided.

Muniz – But there are things beyond our control.

Sheriff Diaz – Yes, there are.

Muniz – So there is such things as pre-destination.

Sheriff Diaz – There two things that are Predestined. Every human being on this rock was born. And I guarantee you, every human being on this rock will one day die. Now, you know about my incident?

Muniz – Your NDE?

Sheriff Diaz – I hate that term. NDE or even Near-Death Experience. Make it sound like a ride at a carnival. It cheapens what happens to a person when they die.

Muniz – What is it you hate about it.

Sheriff Diaz – It’s a term slapped on something incredible. It’s an acronym of the finite trying to contain something beyond even the word infinite.

Ever wonder why the Bible doesn’t talk much about what the next world is like?

Muniz – Some people would say it’s because there’s nothing beyond it.

Sheriff Diaz – Oh there’s something. You want to know why it doesn’t say anything?

Muniz – Sure. Why not.

Sheriff Diaz – How do you describe or explain something where words don’t work. How would an ant describe the Pacific. That it’s wet? How would it describe the wonders and glories of our Solar System or our Galaxy. It doesn’t have the words for it. And neither do we. Words like Vast and Infinite are too small against that.

Muniz – Where are you going with this.

Sheriff Diaz – Being dead, even if it was just for a little while, showed me something I hadn’t expected.

We’re like Huck Finn. We’re going down this river. The river is time. It has a beginning and it has an end when it dumps into the ocean.

And we’re not entirely at the mercy of the water. We can move around in it. Our rudder and steering pole are the choices we make. We can steer for the rapids, or we can steer for the calmer waters.

It’s about choice and people don’t see that. They think we’re locked on our course and none of this matters. Maybe there’s a lot of things we can’t handle. Maybe there’s a lot of things we have no choice in. I mean, if the President makes a call or does something, no matter if I agree with it or not, it impacts me.

That’s a choice he made.

Now, what’s my choice? I can cheer him on. I can be angry over it. And even there I have choices. If I’m angry about, I can do nothing and sulk and bad talk him. Or I can write him. I can write my congressmen. I can write whoever might listen and say, “I think this was a mistake and here’s why.”

The bottom line is, I make the choice on how I’m reacting to it. I can be angry. I can be hateful. I can even let other people sway my opinion. But what’s to be gained by doing that?

And in the case of CID, I let my ego get in the way. I reacted in the wrong way. I became angry. They hurt my pride. And the funny part of it is. I didn’t take it out on them. I thought I was. But who did I hurt?

Not them!

I took it out on me.

And I didn’t even know it. I was the one who suffered for my anger.

Now, how stupid was that!

Muniz – We’re gearing up to start talking about mental health, aren’t we.

Sheriff Diaz – You bet we are.