A continuation of the interview with Sheriff Will Diaz. Will Diaz is the central character in the four novels that currently make up The Lawman Series. The fifth book is expected out about Christmas of 2025.

Richard Muniz: She asked if you believe in God? What did you say.

Sheriff Will Diaz: The answer I gave shows I was burnt out on religion. But it also showed that I at least hoped there was something besides just us. I answered by saying, “I believe there’s something that could be called God.”

Muniz: Why hope?

Sheriff Diaz: I was pretty far gone by this point in my life. I was dealing with years of trauma from Law Enforcement and EMS. My first marriage had failed. I went to Germany and found myself in a war. I was dealing with a lot. On top of that, I was angry.

Muniz: Angry?

Sheriff Diaz: You want to know the sad part of it? I didn’t even know it. And one day it came out.

Muniz: You’re talking about the day you almost shot your platoon daddy. What happened?

Sheriff Diaz: To this day, I can’t rightly say. All I remember is he came up to me and got in my face about something. Now, he’d been riding everyone pretty hard, but in this case, I’d had everything I could take. I was at the end of it and there was nothing left.

Muniz: What did he say?

Sheriff Diaz: (He shurgged) I haven’t a clue. All in know is as he turned to walk away, something in me said, “Screw him.”

It was like I’d become two people. One watching helplessly and unable to do anything. The other burning with rage.

And then there’s a hand on top of mine, and Max was whispering in my ear, “He’s not worth it.”

My pistol was halfway out of my holster. If Max hadn’t done that, you and I wouldn’t be having this conversation.

Click on the picture to learn more about what I’ve written.

Muniz: I remember you telling me the story. And it’s a common thread throughout the books. Why?

Sheriff Diaz: Because, it’s a failure on my part. Let’s talk about that later. OK?

Muniz: I can see from your face that talking about Max saddens you. You OK?

Sheriff Diaz: (Doesn’t answer right away). Despite everything I found out he was doing, he still did good in the end. He was a brother and I owed him more than two in the chest. (Wipes away a tear) We’re through there. Next question.

Muniz: Okay, then. But when did you realize you needed God?

Sheriff Diaz: About two seconds after that happened.

Muniz: I don’t understand.

Sheriff Diaz: Up to that moment, I always thought I could save myself. I was master over myself. And in that split second, I saw me for what I was. That night, I got the only Bible I had taken with me to the Gulf.

Muniz: That Gideon New Testament you’ve talked about?

Sheriff Diaz: Yes. The one with the camo cover. I just opened it at random and it opened to Luke eighteen, verse nine.

Muniz: And?

Sheriff Diaz: And I read about me.

Muniz: What is Luke eighteen, verse nine.

Sheriff Diaz: It’s the story of the Pharisee and the Tax Collector.

Muniz: What does that have to do with you.

Sheriff Diaz: I saw I was the Pharisee.

I mean here I am thinking I’m all it. That I was a good person. I was educated. I was a cop. I obeyed the law.

And lurking inside me was a stone-cold killer.

Now, the Tax Collector. Well, he knew he was anything but good. And rather than bragging to his maker how cool he was, he asked for mercy.

I saw who I was, and it frightened me.

Muniz: What did you do.

Sheriff Diaz: (it took him several seconds to speak again) I closed the Bible and looked up at the stars. I was sleeping on top of the HUMVEE that night. And I prayed the first prayer I’d prayed in a long time. I prayed, “God, if you’re really out there, I need your help. I almost became a murderer today. I can’t do this on my own. Prove to me you’re out there and I’ll serve you all the days of my life. Just get me through this alive and with my sanity intact.”

I’m afraid it’s not much of a conversion story.

Muniz: Did he prove he was there?

Sheriff Diaz: It would take a few months. And Jewell is to blame for that.

CONTINUED

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